The wedding itself was a full day.
In the morning, I dragged myself up, strapped myself into the tux and drove down to H's place. I was one of the drivers for the wedding party, yes, in my little red car. Gave her a "The works' wash" at the gas station but the dryer wasn't working and I ended up with little droplets all over! That was one day when I couldn't afford to argue with the attendant, so I had no choice but to hope that the wind dries the car up along the way.
Reached H's place only to find his sister. Everyone else, including the groom had gone for breakfast. He himself had gone to the bride's place to get some stuff. So much for not seeing the bride before the wedding :) J (best man) arrived shortly. I backed the car into a bush, nearly scratching the body and startling a nice old lady who happened to be walking by. We dressed the cars up with little oriental ribbons, harried the groom into getting changed and went to the hotel to fetch his betrothed. In their nonchalant way, H and his family didn't show much excitement at all. It was hard to actually discern how they felt. Kind of a surprise actually. My family, hardly considered emotional, at least emitted an air of anticipation during weddings. H's parents were like, "Oh, our only son is getting married today. Cool. Whee. Very nice wor."
I'm sure they were ecstatic inside.
The usual malarky happened at the hotel. Photographers recording and choreographing every step, the groom and his men marched up to the bride's room and attempted to bash the door down, demanding, imploring, beseeching, cajoling in various tries to enter and "grab" the bride. The bridesmaids, of course, prepared their usual array of soy sauce and vinegar cocktails, extortions, wasabi-laced cookies and various obstacles to allow the groom to prove his sincerity. After several push-ups and gastronomical adventures, the bride finally looked at her watch and said, alright, it's time to go :P
J (best man) was the main casualty, turning green after downing a whole cup of cooking vinegar for us. He was to puke throughout the day, poor guy. The bride and her party, of course, were unrepentant. :P
This is tiring, all this typing. But I have to go on before I forget.... let's see, the church was next. First time for me, experiencing the western church wedding, where the groom and his retinue gathered in a back room with the priest while guests gathered in the church.
Father David was very nice; he must have experienced trillions of weddings and yet he was very patient, guiding us along whenever needed. The organ sounded absolutely out of this world. The wedding vows were elaborate in the Catholic way, very classic. I remember thinking to myself how funny it was that a lot of the people in the church were from another country, another culture. California is an amazing place.
It was over in a flash. Suddenly, we were outside, taking pictures and making way for the next couple to arrive. Standing there, snapping away at H's relatives, I suddenly remembered how many times H & I biked past the church in the past, making fun of newly-weds who were having their pictures taken. Today, it's H's turn.
Sunday, October 22, 2006
Saturday, October 21, 2006
The Kit Kat Club
Continuing the story started in the previous post, so we arrived at this quiet strip club smack in the middle of silicon valley. Surprisingly, there were quite a few cars outside. A few shady-looking guys smoking near the entrance, and a few ladies dressed in quite out-of-place clothing also taking a break outside. I thought they were patrons at first and didn't really pay attention, but I guess they worked there.
Anyway, admission was $20, the guy didn't ask us for IDs or anything. We went in, those of us who haven't been in one before had quizzical, anticipatory expressions, wondering what's it's like. Well, didn't take long to find out.
The entire place was maybe 3/4 the size of a basketball court. It was dark, and a conference table-type platform with three poles on it was the focus of attention. On it, a stripper took centerstage, sashaying to the music while slowly undressing. Men ranging from their early 20s to late 50s sat around the platform, most of whom were silent, eyes raptly staring at the dancer. There were additional tables around the stage, and the people sitting there were more relaxed and seemed to be talking. It was... an eye-opener. I mean, I didn't know strippers took everything off (duh).
Whoever sat at the table would put dollar bills in front of him for the dancer to come closer and give him some special attention (nothing sketchy, no touching, just more suggestive movements in thanks for the tip). A voice emanating from surrounding speakers introduced the current stripper by name, describing her experience in the field, eliciting applause from the audience. A couple of them were pretty good, (I know what you're thinking) and in a non-sketchy way if one can believe my opinion. I mean, one has to be pretty athletic to gracefully hang upside down on a metal pole.
To the ladies, I guess it was just a job. They walked around, talking to guests and chatting as if it was the most natural thing in the world, strolling around in scanty lingerie, chatting and laughing with the people there. There might have been one or two lady customers, too.
Lonely male engineers, mostly, I'd imagine, with nowhere to go on a Friday night. There were some weird characters, too. There was an empty seat at the stage beside a gentleman in his 50s, so I sat there after getting booted from an unused section (there was another stage in an adjacent section but that was unoccupied. Guess the Kit Kat club had seen better days). Anyway, he immediately gave me a disgusted look and walked away. I wondered if I'd violated some unspoken rule.
Anyway, the long and short of it was, we approached the two most fetching ladies and asked them if they could give H a lapdance each. Of course they agreed ($60 per person) and H had a blast. I could hear him chatting and laughing with the two ladies from across the room. Apparently they congratulated him on getting married and teased him about going to the club. Nice people, not sleazy at all.
Anyway, admission was $20, the guy didn't ask us for IDs or anything. We went in, those of us who haven't been in one before had quizzical, anticipatory expressions, wondering what's it's like. Well, didn't take long to find out.
The entire place was maybe 3/4 the size of a basketball court. It was dark, and a conference table-type platform with three poles on it was the focus of attention. On it, a stripper took centerstage, sashaying to the music while slowly undressing. Men ranging from their early 20s to late 50s sat around the platform, most of whom were silent, eyes raptly staring at the dancer. There were additional tables around the stage, and the people sitting there were more relaxed and seemed to be talking. It was... an eye-opener. I mean, I didn't know strippers took everything off (duh).
Whoever sat at the table would put dollar bills in front of him for the dancer to come closer and give him some special attention (nothing sketchy, no touching, just more suggestive movements in thanks for the tip). A voice emanating from surrounding speakers introduced the current stripper by name, describing her experience in the field, eliciting applause from the audience. A couple of them were pretty good, (I know what you're thinking) and in a non-sketchy way if one can believe my opinion. I mean, one has to be pretty athletic to gracefully hang upside down on a metal pole.
To the ladies, I guess it was just a job. They walked around, talking to guests and chatting as if it was the most natural thing in the world, strolling around in scanty lingerie, chatting and laughing with the people there. There might have been one or two lady customers, too.
Lonely male engineers, mostly, I'd imagine, with nowhere to go on a Friday night. There were some weird characters, too. There was an empty seat at the stage beside a gentleman in his 50s, so I sat there after getting booted from an unused section (there was another stage in an adjacent section but that was unoccupied. Guess the Kit Kat club had seen better days). Anyway, he immediately gave me a disgusted look and walked away. I wondered if I'd violated some unspoken rule.
Anyway, the long and short of it was, we approached the two most fetching ladies and asked them if they could give H a lapdance each. Of course they agreed ($60 per person) and H had a blast. I could hear him chatting and laughing with the two ladies from across the room. Apparently they congratulated him on getting married and teased him about going to the club. Nice people, not sleazy at all.
Mr. Fu's getting married!
Just came back from a night out with H and friends, celebrating the night before his wedding. Yes, the same H who used to complain that he had trouble finding a girlfriend. Little more than a year and a half ago, he showed up for lunch with J, and the rest..... is history. Still can't believe that the carefree, flippant friend I know from school is going to be a mariied man and *gasp* possibly a father in a couple' year's time!
Anyway, the evening began with the rehearsal at MemChu, with both sets of parents, groomsmen, bridemaids, church coordinator, etc. H's parents were the same as always, not saying much, not revealing much in the way of facial expressions. In contrast, J's side of the family were much like her, more outspoken, behaving in a way that's typical of well-to-do Taiwanese, whatever that means :) There I also met the girl I was supposed to dance with at the banquet--J's cousin, who looked (and behaved) like a spoilt 14-year old but who is supposedly attending college. The priest was very patient, putting us through our paces twice. I was expecting a longer wedding given the usual Catholic ceremonies, but this was relatively smooth. Besides me, the other two groomsmen were J, H's college buddy whom I met a coupla' times before, and T, another college buddy of H's who was still on a plane at that time.
Went for dinner at Joy Luck in Cupertino afterwards with H's relatives. Nice people, all from HK, going out of their way to speak to me in Chinese instead of continuing in their rapid-fire Cantonese all the time.
After dinner, H gathered more buddies and we headed out to Santana Row for drinks. The Straits Cafe was too noisy so we went to a nearby pizza place for beer and wine. (Yes, quite pathetic). At that point, I wasn't sure if I should stay 'cos H and his friends were obviously more comfortable speaking in Cantonese to one another--I might spoil their fun. But well, it was H's night and I was determined to stay with him 'til the end (of his single days).
He's funny. Originally, J told me (in front of him) to bring him to a strip club for his bachelor's party, so I did some research and all (check out www.stripclubmap.com), but the dude himself didn't show too much interest. So there we were, sitting around with beers and a bottle of cabernet savignon until midnight, when someone mentioned "strip club..." and "come on H, this is your last chance" and H agreed in his usual nonchalant way. saying some fai cai stuff like "OK lah, we can go tomorrow night also mah." : )
Yeah right. Go to a strip club after your wedding banquet. J's gonna be real happy :P
Anyway, the evening began with the rehearsal at MemChu, with both sets of parents, groomsmen, bridemaids, church coordinator, etc. H's parents were the same as always, not saying much, not revealing much in the way of facial expressions. In contrast, J's side of the family were much like her, more outspoken, behaving in a way that's typical of well-to-do Taiwanese, whatever that means :) There I also met the girl I was supposed to dance with at the banquet--J's cousin, who looked (and behaved) like a spoilt 14-year old but who is supposedly attending college. The priest was very patient, putting us through our paces twice. I was expecting a longer wedding given the usual Catholic ceremonies, but this was relatively smooth. Besides me, the other two groomsmen were J, H's college buddy whom I met a coupla' times before, and T, another college buddy of H's who was still on a plane at that time.
Went for dinner at Joy Luck in Cupertino afterwards with H's relatives. Nice people, all from HK, going out of their way to speak to me in Chinese instead of continuing in their rapid-fire Cantonese all the time.
After dinner, H gathered more buddies and we headed out to Santana Row for drinks. The Straits Cafe was too noisy so we went to a nearby pizza place for beer and wine. (Yes, quite pathetic). At that point, I wasn't sure if I should stay 'cos H and his friends were obviously more comfortable speaking in Cantonese to one another--I might spoil their fun. But well, it was H's night and I was determined to stay with him 'til the end (of his single days).
He's funny. Originally, J told me (in front of him) to bring him to a strip club for his bachelor's party, so I did some research and all (check out www.stripclubmap.com), but the dude himself didn't show too much interest. So there we were, sitting around with beers and a bottle of cabernet savignon until midnight, when someone mentioned "strip club..." and "come on H, this is your last chance" and H agreed in his usual nonchalant way. saying some fai cai stuff like "OK lah, we can go tomorrow night also mah." : )
Yeah right. Go to a strip club after your wedding banquet. J's gonna be real happy :P
Wednesday, October 18, 2006
The aftermath
In some ways, the feeling of separation from a loved one or even from a friend whom I saw everyday is acutely felt. Like coming home to an unlit house. Like smelling only my own food in the kitchen. Like turning down the volume of my speakers so as not to disturb my housemates, only to realise that they aren't here anymore. Empty, gnawing feeling in the stomach? Perhaps, but more importantly, it gives me room to pause and reflect on the important things in life. "No man is an island" ("but one can be a peninsula," said a cheesy high school pal) Whoever said that is pretty darn right.
However, there are good things about solitude too. Suddenly I found myself withdrawing into a shell, able to focus very keenly on certain things such as my studies and interviewing. I made a list of things to do, just to distract myself from useless self-pitying thoughts. Recycling, selling stuff, trashing old things, etc. things that I still have control over. Feels good, in a way.
However, there are good things about solitude too. Suddenly I found myself withdrawing into a shell, able to focus very keenly on certain things such as my studies and interviewing. I made a list of things to do, just to distract myself from useless self-pitying thoughts. Recycling, selling stuff, trashing old things, etc. things that I still have control over. Feels good, in a way.
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